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Tuesday
Mar162010

The Temptation to Text

“My overbite is 100%,” my nine year old tells me. “I definitely need braces.” Her face glows with excitement. Am I crazy or does my daughter actually want braces on her teeth?

“When are you going to make an appointment for me?” she bugs me.

I’m not crazy. At least, not this time. The hip trend in elementary school seems to be braces and an expander. My kids know the names of every orthodontist in town and who goes to whom. Over afternoon snack, I get a report of who got their braces put on, expander tightened or rubber bands changed.

When I was kid, braces were cause for ridicule with names like ‘metal mouth’ and ‘tinsel teeth.’ Headgear was a complete embarrassment that was only rivaled in humiliation by the scoliosis back brace. Times, they are a changing.

The other hot item is a cell phone. No sooner had I allowed my girls to start chewing gum, did they start to bug me for a phone. “Lisa has her own Iphone.” “Charlie’s mom gave him her Razor.” “When can I get a phone?”

After several family meetings, my husband and I caved, getting a family phone for the girls to carry if they stay in an after school program or extended play date. The rules were clear that the phone was to be used only for emergencies.

But I am so stupid. Phones aren’t for making phone calls. No, they are for texting your friends, even if they are sitting right next to you.

When I picked up my daughter recently at a talent show practice, girls were standing around holding their phone in the palm of their hand, hanging down by their side. It reminded me of how we used to hold a pack of cigarettes back when I was in college and smoking was cool. Just like we would pull out a cigarette and light it, each girl checks her phone and opens it up to text. As I scanned the room, there was my daughter using the ‘emergency cell phone’ to text.

Why a cell phone obviously isn’t a cigarette, I do worry they are potentially harmful for kids. First of all, there’s the whole cell phone radiation aspect, while yet to be proven, makes scientific sense. Secondly, texting properly requires a certain level of maturity.

I checked with Dr. Kay Ostenson, a family psychologist, who shared her thoughts. “Text messaging often complicates situations and adds an intensity that’s unfortunate for the kids. Kids will say things over a message that they wouldn’t say in person that could be hurtful.” A ha! My suspicions confirmed.

After taking a good look at the content of my daughter’s texts, I saw that they were innocent and sweet. ‘what r u doing now?’ ‘miss you’ ‘what r u wearing?’ gave me little cause for concern. At least not yet.

My kids and I had a talk regarding the cell phone. And another talk after the phone bill arrived. 170 texts. That’s almost six texts a day. I quickly changed our plan to allow 250 texts a month. While I expect my kids to listen, I know that the temptation to text might strike yet again.

I never would have guessed that the necessities of my childhood would become the cool tools of today -- a phone and braces. My girlfriend told me there is a resurgence of the hulahoop and pogo stick. I can only hope that the once radical hip swirl will add some simple fun to our kids’ busy lives.

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Reader Comments (2)

If we feel our children need a cell phone, we at least need to keep them safe. I witnessed my 12-year-old son texting someone who told him to get on a plane. His reply was "I wish I could, but my parents don't know about you". Apparently, even though I blocked the Internet on his iPod Touch, he downloaded an "app" that allowed him into a chat room. OMGosh!

That scared me so badly, that I decided to block all numbers, except the ones that I approve. I did this through the Parental Controls on the Kajeet website. (Why didn't I block all numbers from the start??) Kajeet is a cell phone service for kids that allows parents to block specific (or all) numbers, except those that we add. Calls/texts cannot go in or out, unless they are on the list. They also have a parent and child wallet to teach kids responsibility. We can also block time periods, like during school, church, and at night. There’s even an “always allow” feature, so parents and children can communicate, even during blocked time periods. There is an optional GPS locator service, too. Plans start as low as $4.99 per month, which is great if you only need a phone for emergencies. You can always get a 15% off discount on phones for using www.kajeet.com/discount.

Oh, and he no longer has an iPod Touch.
March 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSandy
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March 19, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMargieVAUGHN

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